PRETTY confused WOMAN…

I' M A COLORED COCKTAIL:

Before I get into this, let's see how much you know about cocktails!
These are a few cocktails mentioned below. Take a wild guess at each one's color!!! (answers below)

post in your answers as comments

1. ADAMS APPLE-

a) Pink b) Brown c) Purple d) Amber
2. BAZOOKA-
a) Blue b) Rainbow c) Pink d) Off-white
3. SEX ON THE BEACH-
a) Yellow b) brown c) Green d) Orange
4. ALOE VERA-
a) Blue b) Yellow c) Green d) Black

5. ABSOLUT PITSTOP-
a) Brown b) Purple c) Red d) Black
6. ANTS IN THE PANTS-
a) Red b) Brown c) Black d) Yellow
7. MIMOSA

a) Red b) Rainbow c) Orange d) Brown
8. QUICK F-U-C-K-
a) Red b) Blue c) Green d) Black
9. BLUEBERRY CHEESECAKE-
a) Blue b) Yellow c) Off- White D) Green
10. BLUE DEVIL-
a) Blue b) Green c) Yellow d) Brown

10/10 Drunk Skunk- keep walking!
>5 Cheers!
1-5 Camel!
0 Get a LIFE- you don’t drink and you’re color-blind!

HEADY, STEADY, GO!!

Hmm, Go where????

I decided to get into my HEAD the other day. I really wanted to witness what the hell was wrong with my mind. Why wasn’t I ever able to focus on one, single, monotonous unvaried, unitary, unrivaled, unparalleled line of thought? (Pardon the repetition)
I started with a simple question-
Hey Janie, what’s your favorite color?
Pink.. (There I go- that was easy, I was able to picture myself in a pink kurta, near an adorable pink Hutch pug in a pink frock, pink flowers and somewhere felt like Rockstar Pink.)

Suddenly, I remembered Rockstar Pink spelling S.E.X.Y. in a strapping black dress on stage. With that, my neurons went sizzling into jet dark black holes. I could see myself in some siren-hot black bend alongside our very own Karupu (read: black) Superstar Rajni.

Black and WHITE are so much more a couple than Charlie Chaplin and silent movies ever were.
White was obviously the next color I was purifying myself in. What PUTRIDITY?????
Pink, black, white, brown, yellow were forming an entire new palette in my mind: even a rainbow would have learnt new colors from my mind.

Could I ever close in on a unanimous choice?
I guess ‘singledom’ is not wired into my genes.
If I couldn’t choose a simple color, how would I ever choose better things in life?

Careers, men, diets, figure maintenance, hairstyles, PDA’s, countries to settle in, quadruplet childcare, baby diapers, shopping, getting ready for a night out, choosing the right color to offset one’s complexion and figure, matching it all with the right accessories/ cosmetics/perfume/ footwear … - all of them come with ‘no-expiry-date options’ to choose from. It’s like being asked to choose one favorite grain of sand from a never – ending Marina Coastline. Everything comes with an equally disarming number of very delectable options.

When you’re stepping into your LURVER’s house for the first time:
A) You step in with your left FOOT forward.
B) You step in with you right FOOT forward.
C) You jump in with both FEET, so as not to take a chance.
D) You suddenly have COLD FEET about the relationship and stay put outside.

When you’re choosing a sexy black T-Shirt:
A) You pick Size M because it fits you snugly, flaunts your figure- then again, is it a little too snug, are you pinching in your tummy?
B) You pick Size L because it hides the flab, gives you room to breathe a little easy- is it concealing the curves you’re dying to go bold with?
C) You b@@&$ look like flattened tires in this Tee- must you pick a Wired, P#$&-@# to give it the bounce?
D) You wear the XL Tee in the Trial Room, switch on the little fan above ya head, and mime ‘I’m too sexy for my shirt’, and slowly whip it off your head.

When you’re watching an India-Australia match, what are you most likely enjoying?
A) You analyse Dhoni’s masculine ‘legs before the wicket’ and are clean bowled.
B) Hayden calls Harbhajan a.k.a.Bajjie ‘OBNOXIOUS LITTLE WEED!!’ It kind of TURNS YOU ON- like when your boyfriend tells you ‘Youuuuu CRAZZZZZY littleee arseeeeeee’!
C) Sachin was chosen to play in this twenty-20 match, because he has a connection with the Twenty-20 expression- ‘FIFTY-50’
D) You wait to watch the advertisements in between- they inevitably show ‘Yeh kya hua, kaise hua…’condom ads that you otherwise hardly get to see. All's well when balls are well-covered and protected! (We're talkin abt cricket only ;))

Diamonds are forvever! A WOMAN IS EVE FOREVER.
Women want everything; they can’t settle for one thing- ‘EVE’r!
I’m not looking out for a real time remedy, because the first woman EVE herself had ONLY two options-

A) not eat the apple and be happy forever in God’s Paradise OR
B) eat the apple and spell doom for herself, Adam and all the generations to come.

Two options and a bad choice have left us here,
Do you then even reckon the slightest possibility of a woman of today being able to exhibit ‘single-minded’ behavior ever?
Don’t even blame us for it! - BLAME OUR GENES. EVE’S THE FIRST CULPRIT!

Guys/gals- Tell us, in your comments, the most indecisive women in your lives, their most fickle mannerisms and what you consider their most erratic situations!

Answers to a colored cocktail:
1. d) Amber
2. a) Blue
3. b) Brown
4. c) Green
5. d) Black
6 .a) Red
7. c) Orange
8. d) Rainbow
9. b) Yellow
10. a) Blue.